Sisters

Swiped from Gina's blog

A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her Mother. As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter.

"Don't forget your Sisters," she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass. "They'll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you may have, you are still going to need Sisters. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them."

Remember that 'Sisters' means ALL the women... Your girlfriends, your daughters, and all your other women relatives too. "You'll need other women. Women always do." 'What a funny piece of advice!' the young woman thought. 'Haven't I just gotten married? Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a married woman, for goodness sake! A grownup! Surely my husband and the family we may start will be all I need t o make my life worthwhile!' But she listened to her Mother. She kept contact with her Sisters and made more women friends each year. As the years tumbled by, one after another, she gradually came to understand that her Mom really knew what she was talking about.

As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, Sisters are the mainstays of her life. After more than 50 years of living in this world, here is what I've learned:

Time passes.
Life happens.
Distance separates.
Children grow up.
Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes.
Men don't do what they're supposed to do.
Hearts break.
Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors.
Careers end.

BUT.........
Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you.
A girl friend is never farther away than needing her can reach.
When you have to walk that lonesome valley and you have to walk it by yourself, the women in your life will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end. Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you. Or come in and carry you out.

Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters, daughters-in-law, sisters, sisters-in-law, Mothers, Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins, and extended family, all bless our life! The world wouldn't be the same without women, and neither would I. When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other. Every day, we need each other still.


As I grow and (hopefully) mature, I've learned the value of having women in my life. I went through a period when I first moved to Wichita where I could count on one hand the number of girlfriends I had -- not counting old camp girlfriends. I thought all women were catty bitches to each other and would only be friends with me to get at the men I knew. All women were jealous of each other, and who needed that? In all honesty, a lot of the women I knew when I was 20-23 WERE that way, and some were not. I have learned to distinguish the two, I myself have grown, and I have gained some beautiful girlfriends.

When I defended my masters thesis, my primary advisor remarked that she had never seen so many personal friends show up. I DID have a lot of friends there, and the vast majority of them were women. I had to walk the valley of that defense alone, but my girlfriends were there cheering me on. Their energy and their love bolstered me through all the days leading up to that point, and their love was waiting for me at the end.

So I'm going to take this chance to tell my sisters just what they mean to me.

To my family of the heart, my soul sisters -- Anita, Jonikka, Jessie, Edie, Lisa, Naomi, Z, Melissa -- you are the ones who get to see everything about me. The good, the bad, the ugly. You know every secret of my soul, every desire of my heart, every insecurity of my brain, and you love me anyway. I truly wish there were words to express my feelings and my gratitude. Thank you for loving me in spite of me, for helping me grow, for being brutally honest, for always being there.

To all my "old" girlfriends -- Gina, Kim, Suz, Stacie, Jennifer, Tammy, Jenni, Lori, Barb, Ann, Amy, Maria, Isabel -- many of you have known me since we were little at camp, some of you met me later. ALL of you have helped me become a better person in your own special ways.

To my mentor -- Karen -- I never could have gotten this far if you hadn't decided to take a chance. I know you had to have had reservations, but you looked past the wheelchair to see the person. You guided me with gentle advice, nurturing me to be the scientist you could see in me. You gave me sturdy love, being a friend as well as an advisor.

To my dear friends -- Diana, Vicki, Kerry, E, Lynlee, Debra, Natalie, Erica, Ashley, Carol, Elaine -- Your encouragement and your cheering have helped me through so much. I only hope I can return the same to you.

To all my new friends -- Alysha, Amanda, Anna, Rachel, Laura, Danielle, Teresa, Yvette, Natalie -- thank you for giving me yet more opportunities to develop my friendship toward others, to learn how to be a better girlfriend.

To my family -- Mom, Aunt Chrys, Sarah, Jenny, Grandma Ruth, Grandma Betty, Aunt Brenda, Aunt Shelly, Aunt Sandy, Aunt Joyce, Aunt Sandy, Sonya, Nicole, Tammie, Amanda, Kyla, Tara, Ann, Rustee, Selena, Jenika, Beth, Vonda, Linda, Vana, Sandy, Aunt Dee, Aunt Deenie, Aunt Ruth, Aunt Carol, all my great-grandmothers and great-great-grandmothers I never knew -- most of you have known me my whole life, and the rest have known me YOUR whole lives, and a couple have married into the family and are still getting to know me. You were my first encouragers, the first ones to tell me I could do and be whoever and whatever I wanted. Even the ones who poo-pooed my choices added to that determination. I will be forever grateful for your lessons -- good and bad.

To my blood sister -- Stacy -- you already know what we've taught each other and what you still teach me.

To all my sisters -- a thank you that is pathetic in its inadequacy.